connecticut.

I'm not sure what to write about the recent tragedy that took place in conneticut. It is sad, it is horrible, and it is heart wrenching. Whenever I start to think about it, which I have often since it happened, my throat seems to swell and my heart beats fast and my vision becomes slightly blurred. I start to imagine Talis being the one who was sent off to school and receiving the news that no parent should ever have to receive. I feel as though when I think about it for too long and I think these thoughts I start to experience what these parents are going through but I'm not. Not even a little bit. My family is my world and to think of any part of it, especially the innocent and sweet part of it that gives me tender kisses and wants me to hold him most of the day, would wreck me.

It's easy to be cynical in this world today, to think the worst of every person and of every situation. And yet when horrible tragedies like this happen I am reminded of the power of the human spirit. How in the middle of such great loss people seem to come together, to lift each other up, and to extend love to those around them that they might not of before. I watched this clip of one of the victims fathers. After loosing his own daughter in the shooting he talks of his love and condolences to all the victims and their families, including that of the shooter. He is proof that God is far more powerful than evil. That there is still good in this world. Still love and kindness. My thoughts and prayers are with them. May we each try to be the good, the love, and the kindness in this world that often times can seem so dark.

in a blink.

My last post was about Halloween and then I blinked my eyes and we straight by passed November and all it's Thanksgiving goodness and now were already seven days into December. Time is flyin' around here lately and there never seems to be enough of it. Being pregnant with a toddler is purely exhausting. And I feel as though I can never finish anything. For example, I wrote the first few sentences, got distracted, and now several days later am sitting back in front of the computer writing (but I say writing loosely as it's been the only "me" time I've had in a while so it's mostly Pinterest and re-watching the first season of The Walking Dead). The sick bug hit our house sometime last week and still never really left. DJ came down with a sore throat, then a cough, which then progressed to a handful of day and nights spent in bed with a high fever and soon as DJ started to function again Talis took his turn but don't worry, with both the boys on the mend (kinda they're still in pretty bad shape) I started to feel crummy. As we try to all get better the one dominating thing that seems to command my thoughts these days is Christmas. But not the over joyed super excited anticipation of Christmas like usual but almost a overhanging feeling that this year it just seems like a nuisance. I hate even thinking it, especially with Talis and the fun parent moments that I'm sure will happen this year with him. Maybe it's because we've all been sick for so long or that we haven't even put up a tree yet but I'm having trouble getting into the holiday spirit this year. I'm not sure how to get out of this funk. I'm hoping as soon as we get a tree and decorate it my mood will change or maybe I just need a solid nights sleep and stop staying up late doing ridiculous things like browsing Pinterest and watching Netflix.....nah ;)

Halloween 2012

Sadly my favorite holiday has came and went this year but the good news is we celebrated it to it's fullest. DJ built an impressize haunted walkway up to our door so that we could easily scare all the neighborhood kids. We had our families over for chili, cornbread and cider and sat out in our driveway during the night passing out candy. The only unfortunate thing about our celebrations is that we waited too long to take our family halloween picture so sadly we only have a shoddy shot like the one below. You can still see how cute Talis is and how amazing DJ's last minute Shredder costume is so enjoy! Only 363 more days till Halloween again...

being all fall festive

We spent Wednesday at Vertuccio Farms down the street and I can confidently say that place was equally as fun for me as it was for Talis and his friends (maybe even more so). Farm animals, barrel rides, carnival games, and don't even get me started on that bouncer thing (I may have looked up how much one of them costs on Amazon when I got home...may have). I'm glad I got a season pass because I plan on going just about every day. You'd think the awkward stares from parents while I'm wildly bouncing on the bouncer while squealing "Isn't this fun Talis!? Weeeeeeee!" would discourage us from going but embarrassingly it doesn't. 

The black keys

Tuesday night my cousin Missy and I had planned a girls night that involved quality hamburgers and even more quality rock via The Black Keys concert. It did not disappoint (obviously, it's the black keys people). I sang at the top of my lungs and stomped the beat the entire time with my feet. It was loud, it was crowded, and it smelled heavily of weed the entire time. I felt young again and I loved it every bit of it.

Our happenings in an insta-nt

instagram username: leireyn

The Sims legacy

My heart has been filled to the brim the last few days. As my sister and I traveled up to Washington to help move my grandparents into my aunt and uncles house I can't help but feel a little sad. Mostly happy that my grandparents can spend their elderly years together but terribly sad that they no longer will be within "stop by and say hello" distance. I love my grandparents. Actually I think a better way of putting it would be to say I'm in love with them. They are pretty top notch. The last few years have been rough seeing my sweet grandma slowly slip further and further away in terms of her memory and physical abilities but seeing my grandpa care and look after her has deepened my belief of eternal love and they are are shining examples of how to love someone in an eternal way. I've been fortunate enough to spend the majority of my life within walking distance of them and to be states away from them now seems unfair (although it's probably the reverse, I guess my cousins should be able to be so lucky to live by them too). My grandparents have taught me numerous lessons like not to put water on wood furniture, always write your name and address in sharpie on everything you own (you never know when you need that Tupperware lid returned if lost!) and that you can always make a meal out of anything in your fridge and cupboards (which I believe is a gift learned only by those that have lived through the Great Depression). More seriously though the life lessons they've taught have been taught completely by example.

When I think of my grandpa I think of what it means to work hard. I grew to really appreciate the opportunities I had to work by his side. Memories like doing yard work, helping him build a shed addition to his house, shoveling gravel, trimming trees and pulling weeds, and millions if other tasks throughout the years. I think of the importance to connect with others. My grandpas ability to "chat your ear off " has been a family joke since I can remember but the truth is I've never met anyone who didn't enjoy the feeling of being the most important person in the room and that's exactly how my grandpa makes you feel when your talking to him, like he's known you for years.

When I think of my grandma I think of how unselfish she is. Raising five kids with a husband who worked long hours and served as bishop and stake president for many years is something that I can only imagine as exhausting and I can never recall her complaining about it, only being too happy to help in any way she can. I consider my grandma to be the queen of the kitchen. There wasn't a day that went by in my younger years where she didn't make a fresh loaf of homemade bread. I can vividly remember her on her swivel kitchen stool scooting around the kitchen and kneading bread everyday when I got home from school.

Together their examples are even more strong. The love they show for each other is more real and more deep than any love story I've ever read or watched (including The Notebook). They've been married 55+years and they still take every opportunity to hold one anothers hand and tell each other how much they love each other. I can and always will be able to hear perfectly in my head them saying "I love you Bob" and "I love you Kay" each in their own voice and I hope it never goes away, I hope I never forget it. The most important example they have set for me is their love and faith in the gospel. It's hard for me to even put into words how they have even been an example because a long running list comes to my head. Anything and everything you can come up with that entails what someone would do or qualities a faithful latter day saint would have, and they've done it and have those qualities. I love them for that. For throwing themselves into the Lord's work and being truly Christ-like. I wish them the best in this next chapter in their lives together and know that even though I miss them terribly, I'm really happy for them. I'm happy that my grandpa gets to worry less about all the day to day stresses of having a house and responsibilities and gets to just focus on spending time with my grandma. I'm happy that my grandpa can go to bed every night and wake up every morning next to my grandma. I'm happy that he's happy. I know my grandma may just be along for the ride since she might not remember exactly what is going on these days but I secretly think she's a lot more happy too.

Ringing in 24 years of life

Every year when my birthday comes around I am always blown away by how loved and special I feel. Dj spoiled me rotten with clothes and a weekend trip, along with letting me get away with pretty much everything that day including an obnoxiously long nap. Talis gave me the amazing gift of sleeping in until eight so he defiantly killed it in the gift giving department this year (his dad taught him well). My mom told me numerous times throughout the day "happy birthday my sweet little blessing!" , hung out with me an t, and treated me to a much needed pedicure to which both me and my feet were thankful. My brother gave me a shoulder massage which I might add is asked for almost every time I see him and given to me almost never (best shoulder massages people). And not to mention the copious amounts of calls, texts, and facebook messages from friends and family all day. I couldn't have been happier with my day, spent the first part with my mom and the last part with both my boys getting free food at Joes and watching Talis happily run around the Gilbert splash pad. Life has been so good to me every single year I've been blessed to be alive and I can't wait for the next 24! (hopefully more though cause that only puts me at 48...)

Making friends with the wooden statue at Joes BBQ

Night splashing in the splash pad

Breakfast at Matt's Big Breakfast before we headed to Out of Africa 

plum tuckered out

My boys doing what they do best, melting my heart and making me the happiest girl around

birthday wishlist

Yes it is still August and yes my birthday is still a good month away but hey, what can I say? I like celebrating my birthday. And while I like to think that it's not in a self-absorbed way but more a way to celebrate the blessing of conquering one more year my birthday wish list that I've culminated kind of puts a dent in that argument... oh well, here's to a soon 24 years right?!

I love unexpected finds, especially when they consist of my Mowgli bear

Sorting through our pictures and came across this gem of a photo. Love the temple, love that clear blue sky, but mostly love that fluffy haired sweet little boy hammin' it up for the camera.

birthday bash

We had fun last weekend celebrating Talis' birthday with lots of hugs, high-pitched "you're one years old!",  and of course a birthday party. We invited some friends and family over to our neighborhood pool and had a pretty laid back birthday pool party. Talis was a little too busy eating watermelon (or smooshing the few pieces he didn't in his fist) to play in the kiddie pool but he made sure to show off his swimming tricks to some of his fellow swim class classmates in the big kids pool. We had so much fun visiting with everyone who came and can't thank you enough for all the sweet presents you brought for Talis. Happy birthday Talis!

                                                  

a year ago today...the birth story a year later

Today is my sweet Mowgli bear's birthday. I can't believe it, I'm filled with so many emotions thinking about it. The past year has been filled with so many ups and downs, mostly ups, sweet-joyful-heart melting ups. I've learned so much about myself since becoming a mommy to my sweet T, lessons that can only be learned when you experience what it's like to love as a parent. So I couldn't think of a better way to celebrate the priviledge of entering parenthood a year ago other than sharing the precious details of  my sweet Talis' birth story and before my memory of them becomes fuzzy...





The week leading up to Talis birth consisted of DJ working out of town in Dunkin, Arizona and me staying over at my mom's house while he was away. Luckily I didn't go into labor then (which I was really nervous about happening) because Dunkin is a few hours away. Fortunately DJ came home from Dunkin with baby showing no signs of coming. So that Friday (July 8th) we went in for my routine doctors visit. With the baby measuring big the doctor wanted us to go ahead and plan on being induced the upcoming Tuesday (July 12th) if the baby had not come yet. We sat dumbstruck. I was hoping I'd have a late arrival baby (due date was July 18th) even though at this point my wardrobe consisted strictly of stretchy yoga pants and baggy pj tees and my feet resembled water balloons with pickles for toes. I was anxious about motherhood to say the least so I was telling myself I still had about two weeks left. We awkwardly agreed (and I say awkward because we were so surprised at the doctors request that we mumbled what I'm sure sounded like "oh um yah? um k aaaaa sure". The doctor checked me before we left and we were informed I was already dilated at a 3 almost 4 and was effaced some percentage that my mind can no longer recall. We had no idea what that meant so again we mumbled an acknowledgement and left. The entire elevator ride and walk to the car we both had permanent smiles on our faces. Tuesday was the day! or so we thought...

Later that night DJ got called into work and worked through the night. He didn't get home until around 11 the next morning and promptly passed out on the couch downstairs. I was upstairs folding laundry when I felt funny. I ran into the bathroom and jumped into the tub just in time for my water to break. I wasn't entirely sure what to do (since no one tells you that once your water breaks, it continues to leak up until baby time) so I stood in the shower for a little bit. I was not about to get water juice (what would you call it?) all over the carpet so I just started taking a shower while simultaneously yelling down at DJ that my water broke. He never heard me so I made what can only be called a makeshift adult diaper out of a towel and waddled downstairs to wake DJ up. He was a textbook freak out of a husband whose wife is going into labor while I tried to act cool and nonchalant about the whole thing. "Oh hey hun, whats that? your awake now? oh well just fyi my water broke. no biggie. no we don't need to go to the hospital. I'm gonna go do my hair." (my go-to stressful situation handling mechanism is to act cool, way too inappropriately cool). So why DJ showered and got dressed I did attempted to do my hair (I was a sweaty nervous mess at this point so any attempt I made to do my hair were pretty futile). After trying our best to explain to our dogs that when we come home we'll have an extra in tow (dead serious) we called our family and loaded up in the car for the hospital.

Once we got to the hospital they did our paperwork (very slowly in my opinion. What happened to parking in the emergency zone and running in doing loud labor breathing and yelling "she's having a baby! She's having a baby!" ? Father of  the Bride 2 is so off). They took us to the holding room and checked me (dilated to a 6) which I still don't exactly understand but am glad for none the less because it meant that I suddenly was important enough to proceed to the delivery room. As soon as I was in the delivery room they checked me again and was dilated to a 7. Baby would be here fast! And then I got an epidural...

Hearing my mom talk prior about how she progressed so fast while delivering my brother that by the time she was ready to get an epidural it was too late I was determined not to make that mistake. So as soon as I heard I was dilated to a 7 I told the nurse I was ready for the epidural even though I wasn't feeling any contractions yet. As soon as I got the epidural things slowed way down. It seemed like nothing happened for hours, which not much did. Our family was so sweet to stay the whole time too. Everyone pretty much took turns hanging in the waiting room and hanging in the delivery room with us. We had everyone taking guesses on the gender and the time baby was going to make his or her entrance. They eventually started Pitocin on me and after a few hours on that I was deemed ready to push. A little after midnight I started pushing. At 1:58 am our sweet little baby was born. Our little baby was 8 pounds 14 ounces and 21 inches long. Tears and smiles filled the delivery room. We had a baby, a baby boy. Soon after he was born they rushed him over to the nursery to run some tests. I had spiked a fever during labor so they wanted to make sure everything was okay with the little one. He ended up needing to get an IV to get some precautionary medicine and they wanted to monitor him overnight in the nursery for the first night or so. We felt so much love from family and friends throughout our hospital stay. So many people came to see baby and to congratulate us. 

I remember the first night we got to keep him with us in our hospital room. Just us three in our dark quiet room, our own little world, our own little family. It felt right. It felt complete. And while I won't say I knew exactly (or at all) what I was doing it felt natural to me, loving this little baby of mine, caring for him. Between nursing him, pumping, changing his diapers, and trying to take care of myself I don't think I ever slept more than thirty minutes while we were in the hospital and I was okay with that. I felt like it was our own special time me and my baby. With DJ sleeping soundly beside me I would study Talis' face, hold his little hand with my finger, and whisper countless times to him how much I loved him.

I still study his face. His expressive eyebrows when he's mad or concerned and how his cheeks seem to become extra puffy when he's asleep. I still try and hold his hand. Sometimes he lets me when he walks by my side, most of the time his independent self shoos me away. But when he snuggles into me when I'm giving him a bottle he always searches for my finger, like it's his way of reassuring me he's still my little newborn back in our hospital room. And I still tell him countless times throughout the day that I love him. Because I do, and I never want him to forget it.



Happy first birthday Talis. Mama and daddy love you so much. We have experienced happiness and love to it's fullest when we met you. You will always be ours. Our boy, our heart, our own little piece of heaven. 

feeling lucky

wrote this post right before we left for the airport a few weeks ago and forgot to post it. Normally I would just not post it but it was too sweet not to, memories like this one need to be remembered...

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This morning has been a whirlwind of commotion and emotions (hey that rhymes). As we get ready to head up to Seattle today we've been busy packing, cleaning, packing, and some more cleaning. I have this really annoying OCD habit about having to have my house spotless clean before leaving on vacation or going out of town. If it's not, it completely throws off my vacation mojo and it's in the back of my mind the whole time. This morning as DJ headed off to work to try to chip away at the ever growing amount of work he needed to get done before we left I found myself trying to shower/pack/care for Talis/and clean house all at the same time. Needless to say I was failing miserably getting panicked and stressed which lead to a very undeserving phone call to said husband where I complained to him about how much I needed to get done (It's a wonder how this guy lives with me I tell ya). And just when I thought the world was ending (because that's how dramatic I was being) Talis started to calm down, I realized I was done with packing, and the house was almost clean. But the real icing on the cake was seeing DJ come home with a smile on his face as he quickly disappeared to the backyard to do yard work before we left. That guy sure does love me. And while I'm still getting used to the fact that having a family means more dirty floors and piles of laundry more often than not I'm pretty lucky to share those dirty floors and piles of laundry with these two guys (and thank you bunches for putting up with all my quirks and faults, I sure love you two for it).

the northwest episodes: photo diary

Since I could go on and on about all the fun we had in Washington I opted to just cut to the chase, it. was. a. blast. Here is a snippet of the rest of what we got to do. Until next time Washington, you are always so good to us!

the northwest episodes: eagle eyes in spotting eagles

While we were driving we kept entertained by playing the categories road trip game and talking excessively about how cute Talis is. when we were driving the stretch from Ruby Beach to the Sol Duc Falls (which we sadly ran out of time to end up seeing) we spotted some vultures up ahead eating something on the side of the road. When we got a little closer Dj realized there was also a bald eagle there and we all about freaked. Just then the eagle took off and started flying with our car! I tried to get the best picture I could on my phone . We may have turned the car around to take pictures of the eagle in a nearby tree and we may have waited for a significant time in hopes it would fly closer and we may have discovered that what the eagle was eating was a dead deer on the side of the road and I may have taken a picture of it....maybe....I'll go ahead and just blame it on not thinking straight due to how blown my mind was about seeing a real life eagle in the wild.

the northwest episodes: quinalt rainforest

We just got home from camping over the weekend with the Reynolds clan and we had a blast. Unfortunately the more fun a vacation the more tired at the end so I'll post about our weekend a little later when my energy level isn't running on low and I've rounded up some pictures of the fun we had (sadly we failed to take many pictures). So here is another post about our Washington trip for you while I go catch some much needed zzz's....

At the risk of sounding repetitive in describing the Quinalt Rainforest (gorgeous, breathtaking, beautiful) I'll just let the pictures do the talking...

the northwest episodes: ruby beach

Ruby Beach was one of our stops on our road trip while we were in Washington. It's hands down one of the most beautiful and unique stretchs of beach I've seen before. Watching your little one discover sand, I mean truly discover it, how it feels in between his toes and hands and how it feels gritty when you shove it in your mouth...watching him learn about everything around him is a sight to see myself. It's mostly funny (like when he tried to eat the sand) but when you step back and see your sweet kid learning about his surroundings with a backdrop like Ruby Beach and you can't help but feel all warm inside and think "god is good. god is very very good."

a blur of a vacation

 The last two weeks or so have flown by in a blur. All last week we vacationed in Washington. It was an awesome trip (no suprise there). DJ, my mom, T, and I all got to go and I have to admit I felt like the luckiest girl around. Having three of my favorite people with me doing one of my favorite things (traveling) together to one of my favorite places, could last week have gotten any better? (The answer to that is a loud and resounding no!). We were fortunate enough to go to two different weddings while we were there, one for my cousin and one for a family friend. They were both beautiful and sweet as expected. There are so many details of this special trip that I don't want to forget about so I will be doing a series of posts about different parts of our trip. But for now I'll leave you will a picture we took by the ever so beautiful Cresent Lake. 

Fathers Day

These last few days have been a whirlwind. With everything from packing,flying, and being involved in a friend's wedding (with my cousins wedding following a few days behind) it's nice to have a day to remember how great fathers are. In my case I thought numerous times about all the great fathers in my life. My hardworking grandfather who can rival any storyteller I've ever met, my ever faithful mom who has played the father role in my life, my soft spoken father in-law who has endless amounts of patience, and of course to my husband. Fatherhood never looked so natural for a person. Happy fathers day to all those men (and single moms) out here showing sons how to be men and daughters how to be loved by them.

Hot dogs and baseball

Our Friday night was spent going to the Diamondbacks game courtesy of the free tickets Dj scored from work. I was a little apprehensive how Talis would do since he seems to only be content these days when he's making mischief but between dad's hot dog, the cheering crowd, and the endless amount of coworkers fawning over him it was hard to tell he was a rookie baseball fan. I get pretty bored watching baseball so having this cute face by my side defiantly made the game more entertaining.

memorial day two weeks later

I'm finally getting around to writing about what we did on Memorial Day weekend because Dj finally got around to transferring his phone pics to the computer (I never seem to have the camera charged when I need it). Josh and Carlie stayed with us while Annette, Jeff, Juelaine, and Puna stayed with my mom. It was so fun getting to see Talis and Jayla hang out all weekend together. We spent the weekend with the Noa family relaxing, bbq-ing, and playing games. We spend actual Memorial Day taking the babies to the Phoenix Children's Museum with Josh and Carlie. The weekend went by way to fast for my liking and as usual we are left wondering why we all live so far away from the Noas. We love you guys!